His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
