oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Randomize
