So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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