I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
