i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize