just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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