16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Drake has all the answers
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
