There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
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