Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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