Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
