D3 body, D1 cock
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
