I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
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