i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
