i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize
