Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
