This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
