i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
