AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
