idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
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just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
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We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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