Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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