what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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