Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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