Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
