I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
