i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
