I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
