i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
