My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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