I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
