I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
