no, he came in my armpit
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
