this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
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