At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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