I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
