i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize