dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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