i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize