I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
