he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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