Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
