It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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