He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Randomize
