Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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