Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
