Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
