erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you traded sex for a burrito?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
