when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
wanna go halves on a baby?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
