Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
