Porn is love you can see.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
