butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
