Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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