I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize