New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize