M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
